Very funny

Post by Hamza Bibi.

To give you a lift

I came across this which I think is quite cheery.

Baffled

I'm confused because jeans, which I bought the other day, proved to be too long. This is strange because I always buy the same leg length (29 ins just in case you want to buy me a pair) and I measured them and they were exactly the length as advertised.
I had them shortened by 1.5 inches and now they fit much better. The only answer is that I'm shrinking, but 1.5 inches seems an awful lot or another answer could be that I've always bought my trousers too long. Hmmmm?

Damn, where is it?

Two young men, one each living either side of us has left home this weekend. On one side for further education and on the other to join the army.
Given the position of their bathroom and the proximity of our respective houses we could, from time to time, hear the army hopeful having a shower. The music blared out and after a short silence you could hear him shout, "Mum can you pass me a towel?"
Move this forward to next week and think about the reaction to, "Sarge, can you pass me a towel?"
A quick lesson in growing up will ensue methinks.

100 more sleeps

I saw the first mince pies the other day in Morrisons. I lurv mince pies.
Yippee, only one hundred sleeps before christmas.

Phones

We live in an area that does not have good phone reception.
When we first moved here our phones with Vodafone were useless. I was told that Orange were the best, just, at reception but I went with Three because I like their tariffs (being the smallest they have to try harder) and I eventually got a femtocell for the house (from Three) so that we have full five bar reception.
I'll admit I'm a bit geeky and have long wondered what kind of reception I could get with Orange so, when out and about (in Brighton) one day, I popped into their shop and bough a very cheap smartphone so that I could test their reception. Which so far is about the same as Three.
As an aside the phone, a Huawei, is very good. It cost £39 and is easy to use, does all the things I expect a phone to do and does it well and now makes me wonder why I, and many others, get so fixated with phone technology and having to have the latest and best.
The graphic above sums it up.

Harrogate

I've always said that Harrogate is somewhere that you want to leave when you're 18 years old but when you get to 50 you wonder why you ever thought like that and want to get back.
Reading this article the other day made me realise how lucky we are to live where we do. The move from France to Yorkshire was mostly motivated for the need to be nearer my mother as she grows older and more frail but having said that we've been pleasantly surprised about how good the weather has been, how nice the people are and how good the shops are. Not nice weather in a tropical sort of way but plenty of sunshine, little rain and temperatures not exceeding 20C, sort of way.
It's easy to complain about where you live but having now lived in various places in the UK and also France I can honestly say that you could do a lot worse than this part of the world. You could spend a lot of time researching places to live but for me the best place to live is wherever Jan is (OK, sorry, pass the sick bucket).

Wind farms

I have just driven from the Spanish border in France to Calais. I must have seen in the region of 50 wind turbines, probably more, throughout this 800 mile journey and, unbelievably, only 3 were actually working.
Something is very, very wrong here. They are very expensive to build and maintain without getting into the cost of land rental and subsidies.
We wouldn't ever let that happen in the UK, would we?